The author of the new book I am reading sums up intimacy in two striking sentences,
“Activity for God is not the same as intimacy for God or identity in God. And it is your intimacy with Christ that gives you your identity.”
The words are simple but the message is deep. All the things we do for God, in His name, are kind of meaningless unless there is an intimate connection with God.
This intimate relationship with God is the same as an intimate relationship in marriage. Just because Nathaniel and I do things together like watch T.V., go out to eat, vacation together, and even have sex with each other doesn’t mean much of anything if we are not first intimately connected. These things just stay shallow activities if we lack a deeper connection with each other in each activity.
When I am reading my Bible but I am not that into it that day because I am distracted or too tired or feeling like I would rather do anything else then I am not fully connected to God through His Word. I’m lacking in that intimate relationship He wants me to engage in. Reading the Bible is great but I’m pretty sure if I am not into it in that moment God would prefer me to come back to it when I can fully enter in. He would rather me make the connection and deepen our intimate relationship than watch me muddle thought verses not retaining or feeling anything.
The same concept holds true for my marriage. After Nathaniel has been at work all day and I’ve been homeschooling and teaching dance classes and we often find each other again at the end of the evening sitting in front of the television. We have a choice here in this moment. We can watch the flickering lights side by side, staring forward with occasional face to face looks, smiles, laughs and comments about the show. Or we can sit and engage more intimately. We more often than not choose the latter. We sit closely, always a body part or two touching; hands, legs, feet, head to chest. We often break the zombie-like stare at the T.V. we can get sucked into with conversation. Nathaniel, several years ago started pausing the T.V. whenever one of us would start talking. We look at each other even if it means moving from our comfy lounging positions and then move back to cuddling. We both engage in the conversation with words, body movement and eye contact. We turn the T.V. numb out time into an intimate connection and sex isn’t even involved.
Intimate connections are everywhere; it is simply a change in point of view to see them sometimes.
How intimately connected are you to God?
How intimately connected are you to your spouse?
What is the disconnect between you and your intimate connections?
I encourage you to start by being observant and mindful of your intimate connections with God and your spouse…because until we notice, change cannot occur.