Christina Says…

We are on day 1050 of an intimacy streak intended to last a mere 365 days, and we are both sick with bronchitis. I’m only about a week and a half in, while my husband has been coughing for three weeks now. With our worse symptoms behind us we are now climbing our way back up to health, though not without coughing, sneezing and a consistent layer of low energy.

Yet, despite the bronchitis, we have continually managed to ride this intimacy horse every night.

HOW??? WHY??? Seriously… over 1000 nights?


In just over a month from now we will have been on our intimacy journey for three years straight! That’s a lot of sex! And almost three years ago we made a pact with each other to continue with nightly sex until we reached our goal, (though once reached, we set another much loftier goal). The intimacy pact began with sex, but has grown to be a representation of a much deeper agreement. When we decided to have sex every night for a whole year what we were really agreeing on was to put each other first on a consistent basis, not just when we felt like it. For us sex was the conduit, but this promise to put each other first could have taken a million other forms. For it’s not the form, but the intention and the reach out to let my husband know how loved, respected, appreciated and actually liked he is by me.

Since I really do love, respect, appreciate and like my husband, all that should come out in my daily actions anyway, without me trying… right? Sure, on Cloud Cuckoo-Cuckoo Land where anything is possible, magical and perfect. Here on earth I have to make my feelings known to my husband through my actions, even when I am sick!

It is so easy to let Nathaniel assume I still admire, respect, love, like and want to be with him, I mean I did marry the guy and he should remember that I feel this way. But, it is not just about the remembering…

Remembering a piece of information doesn’t make it real; experiencing it brings it to life.

It is so easy to get caught up in this state of mind, feeling like I don’t need to show my husband I love him because there are so many other things that take my time, attention and energy…laundry, dishes, teaching dance, bronchitis. But, allowing myself to succumb to the ease of not showing my love in the day to day, even when I am sick, only adds layers of detriment to the marriage. Why add layers of bad when I can choose to add layers of good?

I urge you to make time for your spouse daily. Show your husband or wife how much you love, honor, respect and like him/her.

Today, how can you show love to your spouse? And how can you implement this daily? Make a choice to include showing this love to your spouse daily. Add it into the schedule along with the dishes, laundry and even bronchitis, because in the long run, it’s not about you….life is always about other people. God’s plan for your life is for you to show love to others, always and in every way.

Make time for your spouse, carve out the time, don’t just squeeze it in, and you will enjoy the benefits of a life well lived!




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