November 25, 2013, day one, two days before my husband’s 37th birthday. I am sure it was a pretty normal Central Valley November day. The day was probably full of sunshine, crisp air and pies baking for our traditional Thanksgiving /birthday party. It was a normal day at the Rhoads’ house. Two young blond boys played bouncy ball in the house while cartoons flickered on the television. I am sure someone had a tantrum right in the middle of the kitchen while I baked pies and I was needed to not only play the roles of Head Pastry Chef, Adoring Wife, and Creative Homeschool Teacher, but now Games Referee. Nothing about this day was different or more special than any other blessed day on God’s green earth. Except today was the day my husband and I went streaking.
We are an American non-average family. Between us are three kids, all boys. We have two dogs (more boys) and four cats (my only female companionship in the house). We live in a California Central Valley town in a society of people who do their best to get by. We are not the average, not the norm, we are the outliers and we like it that way. We homeschool two of our three boys (the eldest being 20), play with them and talk with them daily. We are very active in various aspects of our church. We have a close family and a few good friends. We work out, eat well, talk deeply, spend little time on social media and most abundantly and above all love Jesus with all our hearts. We strive to not just learn about Jesus but absorb Him and His ways into our lives. We make daily efforts to follow His path for our lives. We choose to do more in and with this life we have been given than just get by.
When we started our journey I was a 36 year old stay at home mom and a homeschool teacher. Nathaniel (my adorable husband) was a 37 year old customer service representative at a box plant. On the outside we looked like everyone else, on the inside we were vastly different from the norm and more change was upon us.
During our marriage we have had several streaks of intimacy, some short ones with five days in a row. Others topping out at 12 days. We got a bit more serious, and buckled down for a 20 day streak in the sack, mostly to see if we could do it. We could. Blew right past it. So far past we ended up at 30 days in a row. Around this time of attempting to reach 30 days of happily married sex in a row I read an article on Yahoo about a couple who had sex for 365 days in a row. The seed was now planted in my head to give this a try ourselves. While I was excited at the thought of this sexual feat I was nervous too, could we actually accomplish it? Who were these people? How did they really do it every day for a whole year? Did they have kids….if so weren’t they tired at the end of the night? And come on, neither husband nor wife became ill or left each other for a business trip over night?
As intrigued as I was I did not mention this to Nathaniel for a bit, not wanting to jinx a possible 365 stint under the covers. My ideas tend to be less than great ones. I tend not to be a big picture thinker and I often jump from A to Z in one fell swoop, forgetting all the possible bumps along the road that could occur. I often see the world through pink, flowery lenses, while my husband is the more logical of us two and always sees the work it takes to get from idea to completion that I never see.
I did eventually tell my husband about this article but I left it at that, just a story about some people who did an amazing thing. As the next few days and weeks rolled by we had been gaining speed on our streak of 30 days in a row. Unbeknownst to each other we both kept this couple and their story tucked away in our respective memories. We reached day 30 and just kept going. On day 40 this Yahoo couple entered our conversation once more. What if and could we questions were mixed with giggles of excitement as we began to decide to follow the path of a couple we had never met. We thought we could do it, we thought we could sustain it, we had grandiose ideas and glee-filled wide open eyes as we pressed on toward our new goal, never once thinking about how it would change us.
The question was not should we?
The question was not could we?
The question we never asked was how is daily sex connected to every other aspect of our lives?